Causes of relationship problems
Infidelity: While infidelity is a problem in itself, it may also indicate that other underlying issues need to be addressed.
Jealousy: You may feel jealous that your partner is spending time with other people or you may be jealous of their successes and achievements.
Trust: Trust is vital to a successful relationship. Trust can sometimes break down due to bad experiences in this or a past relationship (e.g. finding out about an affair) or be unjustified.
Differing expectations: Problems may arise if partners haven’t communicated what they want out of a relationship, e.g. a long term relationship, children, or a short term fling.
Imbalance in the relationship: When one partner regularly supports the other, this can cause imbalance in the relationship, e.g. needing financial support or support for a problem such as addiction or a mental health problem.
Dealing with relationship problems at home
Many relationship problems arise due to inadequate communication. Communication may become an issue because of relationship problems or as a result of a particular problem, e.g. not wanting to talk after finding out about a partner’s infidelity. Talking directly to your partner, if possible, is the first step in tackling the problems.
Talking gives your partner the chance to see things from your perspective – they might not realise there is a problem at all. Open discussion can be very effective, but only if you are both willing to listen to and accept the other’s views. Such discussions may make you feel angry. In such instances it is important to take some time out and think about what your partner has said. Then you can return composed, so that you don’t automatically start arguing. If you feel you can’t talk face to face, writing a letter may help you express your feelings clearly. Sometimes writing a letter to your partner (irrespective of whether you intend to send it) is a good way of organising how you feel and why you feel this way.
If you feel you cannot opening discuss your problems with your partner due to arguments or worse, then you may need to seek help.